Chuck: Chuck versus the Anniversary

“I can’t believe how fast they rebuilt it.”

Let’s talk about sexting. Well, let’s start by talking about sexting, and then work our way backwards and forwards. By the end, we’ll all have learned something important about ourselves, and (hopefully) I will have figured out what I think of this episode. (That’s not a very auspicious way to start my first recap for chucktv.net, is it?)

The sexting joke was silly the first time Morgan brought it up. Yes, some people text their phone sex, instead of doing it the old-fashioned way with tin cans and string. (Kids these days.) It was sillier the second time, when Chuck and Sarah talked about it awkwardly. And it hit the rock bottom of the silly-canyon when Sarah started taking mock-sexy pictures of herself on the airplane. But once she and Casey were tied to the chair, and the sexting joke came up again, Casey’s punchline suddenly made it all funny: “What? What does that even mean?”

That’s a lot of build-up for very little payoff. I wonder if this episode originally came in at just 30 minutes, and the writers decided they needed to extend a few scenes: the sexting, the scene where Chuck decided to decrypt then download (instead of the other way around), the repo man gag. All played a bit too long for me. On the other hand, the quick recap of Chuck’s interviews was hilarious and perfectly timed.

But that’s not why we’re here. Why are we here? Linda Hamilton! The internet rumor made flesh! Chuck’s search for his mother is the new governing principle of Chuck’s return to the spy games (and lying to Ellie again). He and Morgan spent $43,000 on a worldwide globetrot only to wind up in an empty room in LA,  unemployed, car-less, and only one takeout menu closer to the truth.

Lucky for them, the CIA has repurposed the BuyMore. I’m not sure how I feel about this—it comes back to the issue of build-up vs. payoff. I really thought the BuyMore was finally over at the end of Season Three. I really thought Chuck lying to Ellie would stop being a thing. But now we’ve re-set: Chuck works at the BuyMore as a cover for being a special agent, and he’s lying to Ellie about his true employment. Ahem. Again.

Some changes have stayed the same, though. Chuck and Sarah are still going strong (although their timeline seems a bit confused); Casey is still a grump with a heart of gold; Morgan is still hilarious, and still a spy-sidekick. A spykick. And some things are really new changes: Ellie is (finally!) pregnant, and Chuck seems a bit more bittersweet than usual. The loss of Scott Bakula is not to be forgotten, and Chuck’s search for his mom is going to be emotionally fraught for both him and Ellie when she eventually finds out. Oh, and the BuyMore has a slide! I hope we see more of the slide.

And more Linda Hamilton, of course. She’s a kick-ass feminist icon of my misspent youth, and I’m getting a real Irina Derevko vibe so far.

Bytes:

• Chuck: “This is not the opening of a TV show. This is real life.”

• Morgan: “Me and you. Real spies…Sunblock! We need sunblock!”

• Sarah: “By the way, good idea to bring the chutes.”

Casey: “Thank you.”

• Morgan: “Sexting. It’s short for sex-writing.”

• Chuck: “I’m 100% snatchable.”

• Chuck: “We’re going to Russia.”

Morgan: “Okay. I’m going to have to sell my Millenium Falcon.”

• Chuck: “The plan was for me to be Carmichael, and you to be Sven, my mute assistant.”

And Pieces:

• I loved the low-budget old-fashioned map montage.

• Harry Dean Stanton! Dolph Lundgren!

• The soundtrack was great, as always. It was nice not to hear the Ring theme, either.

• The shootout in Moscow was beautifully shot.

When push comes to shove, this is still a great show. So they haven’t completely re-invented themselves. Is that necessarily a bad thing?

Three out of four Sarah Connors

(By  the way, you might be wondering who I am. I’m Josie Kafka, and I review Chuck, Fringe, and The Vampire Diaries for billiedoux.com. And now, thanks to the goodwill of the chucktv masterminds, I’m recapping Chuck here, too!)